Before I had Max I had a really clear view of what kind of parent I wanted to be.
I think it’s a commen theme amongst first time parents you get it in your head that everything in baby land will be black and white. Then reality hits hard nothing is black and white EVER.
I wanted to be a fun but firm parent. I wanted every moment to be magical for my son I wanted to be encouraging him with everything we did together.
Yeah so that’s not real life. When there first born it’s easy all they do is sleep eat and poop (if you have a boy they also wee on you A LOT) then they start hitting milestones which is really exciting. You feel a great sense of a accomplishment and pride the first time they do anything. You feel like you really helped them to achieve that milestone.
Then the first birthday hits and that all goes out of the window. They become more restless and frustrated as they hit the bigger milestones like walking and talking. That’s when the tantrums arrive with a bang.
Tantrums make parenting super hard. I find them draining. I used to get so upset when Max would scream and bang his head on the floor (thankfully he seems to be growing out of this phase).I also found max was a nightmare for me but a angel for his dad,it must be me I used to think he must hate me I must be such a bad mum.
My hormones probably played a big part in how I was feeling. Now when my head is clear i see this is not the case. Max is with me all day,he sees his dad for 3o mins before bed during the week of course he’s going to act out for me.
Being pregnant (especially now at 38 weeks) I have let the boy get away with murder and I’ve prob been a bit soft with him. This is something were going to revisit once we’re all settled as a family of 4.
I guess the main gist of this post is that as parents we put the bar so high but in reality we need to just give our self’s a break. I’m always seeing memes saying the same thing… you know blah blah your doing great. Truth is most of us totally are. The way I see it now is don’t sweat the big stuff it’ll all fall into place in the end.