Todays the day

A few weeks ago I wrote a post about my birthday (you can read it here ) and how it really is just another normal day  (sad but true,well in my case anyway)

The big day has arrived and it really is no different. There’s still mountains of ironing and washing to get through bottles to be sterilized and bums to be wiped. Payday isn’t till tomorrow so there isn’t even any cake.

It’s really made me think back to my younger days when birthdays were a thing to be celebrated. You would literally count down to that special day and plan every little detail of your night out meticulously. I honestly believe that once you get past 30 you start to wish you could take the years back instead of forward.

Is it a parenting thing that makes me not really care about the day I was born as much and are there others out there like me. So I decided to ask the blogging community what they do to celebrate (or if they don’t) their birthdays.

Heres a selection of my favorite answers, I’ve also included links back to their blogs. If you’re anything like me you love finding new blogs to follow. There really is nothing like spreading a little blogging cheer:

 

Sarah at Whimsical Mumblings:

My birthday is the day before my little girls. I feel birthdays as a parent are no longer important, maybe even forgotten about, but that’s ok. It’s all about making sure your little ones have a special, memorable birthday instead.

http://www.whimsicalmumblings.co.uk/

Jo at Miracle Max:

This year I was lucky enough to be taken to a spa for the night with my husband. Much needed being new parents to a 4 month baby boy.

http://miraclemax.co.uk/

Alison at Being a mummy with me

I used to get quite sad around birthday time as I have a chronic illness and it always used to make me think “another year ill” but my little girl (7) makes a big fuss of my birthdays & gets as excited about them as she does for her own! I love the homemade stuff she makes me which always makes it really special.

http://beingamummywithme.blogspot.co.uk/?m=1

Mo at Adventures of a novice mum

My birthdays as a parent is not much different from my pre-parent birthdays in recent years; with the exception that I’m more prone to forget it’s my birthday until someone reminds me. It’s fun hearing my toddler singing ‘happy birthday’ to me; I suppose in that regard it’s better, because we have lots of giggles with it. I’m not inclined to do anything tangibly special – life doesn’t stop, and it’s usually a work day for me – but this might change as my child gets older and engages with birthdays more. I also don’t expect any acknowledgement of it from anyone, but my husband usually gets me something, which is nice.

http://adventuresofanovicemum.co.uk/

I absolutely had to include this last one. A birthday at the tip, it sounds like something my hubby would do:

Amanda at The Family Patch

My favourite birthday story is how my husband took me to the tip for my 30th birthday… I kid you not, it was my first day off in months and I wanted to clear the house and so we went to the tip after dropping O off at nursery, but got there an hour before it opened and sat in the car outside the tip for a whole hour first thing on my first day as a 30 year old. We then went to have a birthday lunch somewhere, which turned out to be closed, so my husband was about to give up and take me home but I sulked and we ended up driving to another town on an impromptu “your birthday has kinda sucked so far, let’s make it awesome” moment 🙂

http://www.thefamilypatch.com/

This little exercise has made me feel a little better about not really being fussed about celebrating the day I was born.

It seems the general consensus is that life after children is mainly about the children but that the odd surprise on your birthday is lovely (hubby take note). 

I also long for when the boys are old enough to really get into birthdays whether it be there own or ours. I cant wait for homemade cards and gifts. 

Do you have any birthday stories either pre children or after.

Do you find the older you get the less inclined you are to go all out or has nothing changed for you? 

 

 

 

 


Best of Worst

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Angelcare bath seat *review*

When Max was born we used a traditional baby bath to begin with. I don’t know about you but I found this to be a bit of a nightmare. It was so hard to hold the baby as well as give him a wash there just wernt enough hands. The throught of bathing him on my own made me come out in a deep sweat. I just didn’t know how I would manage it.

When I stumbled upon the Angel Care bath seat I honestly couldnt believe my luck. It was perfect just what we needed. The solution to arkward newborn bathing a complete hands free bath seat that we could actually use in the bath.

The base of the seat is made from a soft silicone type of materal (the prooer name is TPE material) ehich molds nicely to the shape of babys bum and back. It also soaks up the warmth from the water so baby doesnt feel cold.

The seat has a rubbery edging so it kind of sticks to the bottom of the bath (which is a godsend you really dont want the chair toppling ever). It has a max line in case your unsure how high to run the bath and comes with a hoop and a hook to stick it to the wall meaning storage isnt a problem.

The seat can be used from birth up to 6 months which is much longer thsn a baby bath. At 6 months Max was sitting up so we just put in him the bath without a seat.

You can buy the Angelcare bath seat from a lot of retailers now (including Mothercare). We purchased ours from Amazon it was ÂŁ25.00 if I remember correctly. The price is a little steep but we got a lot of use out of it. We’re using it again for baby number 2 so def getting our moneys worth.

I used it to keep Kai close while bathing Max.
I would absloutley recomend this seat. It’s  perfect for making life a bit easier.

*please note I was not sent the seat or paid to review this item. All opinions are my own *

According to Max it makes a pretty good seat as well.

Diary of an imperfect mum

We're going on an adventure

The bane of our existence… WIND!!!!

We hate wind in this house. Not the weather kind but the newborn struggling to bring it up kind. 

Actually thats a lie we think adult wind is funny unless its a evacuation of the room type of blow out (come on be honest flatulence is funny)

Its baby wind we despise. 

Some people are fab at bringing up wind others mmmm not so good. Me I’m in the middle. If its during the day and I dont have to see to Max because for example his tipped his entire plate onto the floor then im a fab winder.Its all about having the time which sounds mean but with 2 kiddos you need to assess each situation on a ad hoc basis. 

At night I tend to get a bit lazy.

To be fair im usually knackered and gagging to sleep by then (anyone with a newborn will be able to relate)

Tonight seems to be good so far for the wind and im thinking its time to go up to bed.

Wow I look tired. Kai on the other hand..

This is my view right now. You really cant beat snuggles with a baby whatever the age. Hes having a good giggle in his sleep,I’m glad one of us is having a good time. 

Please also excuse the double chin I just had a baby.That has to be the greatest line ever  thou Ive been told im not allowed to use that as a excuse anymore (the phrase “whatever” comes to mind)

How are you at bringing up the windypops (baby speak for wind)?

The transistion from cot to toddler bed

If you’ve read any of my previous posts about Max and he’s new room you’ll know that we finally finshed the room on Thursday night.

The gate went up and he had his first night in his new room. 


What a bloody first night it was, in a word it was a nightmare. He didnt want to sleep he wanted to bang the door a million times (the wall now has a lovely handle shaped dent in it) he wanted to shout at the gate and run around like a nutter.

The net told me to just calmly take him back to bed when he got out,to avoid any type of communication and definitely NO EYE CONTACT. I did this 50 times before I realised this methods bullshit and wasnt working for me. 
Then came the crying ,uncontrollable sobbing. I relented and soothed him (being his first night and all). Still didnt work I had barely shut the gate before he was up again.

By this time it was 10 pm and I was at my wits end.It was time to bring in the big guns(daddy). Somehow he settled him and Max decided it was time to sleep. Sleep he did all the way to 7 am for his bottle then till 8.30am. 

The second night we went out, Max’s aunt offered to babysit (crazy girl) and he went down at 9. A huge improvement on the night before. This time I was told instead of door banging it was dragging his dummy across the gate. He slept thru again similar times to the night before.

Last night was night 3. We had been at a friend’s for the day so it was a late night for him we put him down at 8.30.  I had 30 mins of chat then sobbing. I went in to him once. It was really quiet upstairs so I tiptoed to check on him and lo and behold he was asleep HURRAH. He woke during the night (I think a bad dream)I went in and soothed him and back off he went. Touch wood hes still asleep now.

Errrrr thats not your comfy bed.

Im hoping that the rest of the week goes well. I realky want him settled in there before new baby arrives (if he ever decides to make a bloody appearance)

Don’t sweat the big stuff 

Before I had Max I had a really clear view of what kind of parent I wanted to be.

I think it’s a commen theme amongst first time parents you get it in your head that everything in baby land will be black and white. Then reality hits hard nothing is black and white EVER.

I wanted to be a fun but firm parent. I wanted every moment to be magical for my son I wanted to be encouraging him with everything we did together. 

Yeah so that’s not real life. When there first born it’s easy all they do is sleep eat and poop (if you have a boy they also wee on you A LOT) then they start hitting milestones which is really exciting. You feel a great sense of a accomplishment and pride the first time they do anything. You feel like you really helped them to achieve that milestone. 

Then the first birthday hits and that all goes out of the window. They become more restless and frustrated as they hit the bigger milestones like walking and talking. That’s when the tantrums arrive with a bang. 

Tantrums make parenting super hard. I find them draining. I used to get so upset when Max would scream and bang his head on the floor (thankfully he seems to be growing out of this phase).I also found max was a nightmare for me but a angel for his dad,it must be me I used to think he must hate me I must be such a bad mum. 

My hormones probably played a big part in how I was feeling. Now when my head is clear i see this is not the case. Max is with me all day,he sees his dad for 3o mins before bed during the week of course he’s going to act out for me. 
Being pregnant (especially now at 38 weeks) I have let the boy get away with murder and I’ve prob been a bit soft with him. This is something were going to revisit once we’re all settled as a family of 4. 

I guess the main gist of this post is that as parents we put the bar so high but in reality we need to just give our self’s a break. I’m always seeing memes saying the same thing… you know blah blah your doing great. Truth is most of us totally are. The way I see it now is don’t sweat the big stuff it’ll all fall into place in the end. 

Max Update

Can you believe I still don’t have my phone back. This is week 3, WEEK THREE I’m on the verge of a breakdown can you tell :).

Samsung have basically given up trying to fix the screen and have instead offered me a new one, which is great but ….. they have the most longest process of getting a new phone out. Its pretty ridiculous when you think we could just walk into a store and pick one up.I think it’s a case of poor communication between one department and another.

Being phoneless is driving me nuts.My whole life is on that device, which when you think about it is pretty sad. What did we do before smartphones and I have to say I don’t know. 

Don’t you feel liberated my husband asked me in week 1, no I feel lost was my honest answer. This morning I’ve decided to get on the PC and get a few posts out.I’ve worked hard on this blog over the year and I don’t want it all going to waste now.

So bare with me the posts will be a bit thin on the ground but once I get the beloved smartphone back you’ll be hearing much more from me ( yayyyy I hear you cheer).

I really want to do a post about Max. My blog started as homage to the mad one and how he has changed my life. He still is very much my main focus but what with baby number 2 on the way and a few rants sometimes his progress report slips to the wayside.

Max is 19 months now (amazes me how quickly time has flown) and a real cheeky chappy (chappy being a polite way of saying sod). He achieves so much each day. When your babies are little babies every new milestone seems so huge. The first smile, laugh,roll,crawl,walk everything is so momentous. Once they get a bit bigger the milestones are still just as a big deal but are slightly smaller if that makes sense (which i’m aware it probably doesn’t). Let’s break them down :

Walking :

As most of you know Max started walking at around 15 months. To some this is a little late but to us he walked exactly when he was supposed to. Were encouraging him to walk when we go out places (though this often takes ten times longer because he has a obsession with cars and window displays) he is the proud owner of his own set of reins. They really are the best invention although sometimes I do feel like i’m walking a dog. Recently he’s added running and jumping to the walking skill set which is always funny to watch.

Talking:

This child definitely takes after me in the respect that he is a chatterbox. He doesn’t stop talking.Easily 90% of the time we have no clue what he’s saying but we nod, smile and join in the conversation which seems to please him. When he makes noises we don’t make the noise back. The idea being we want to engage him with words not sounds. The word catalogue is getting pretty extensive the most recent being “apple” “Up and Down” “a ball” and ” goal”. Hes a prize mimicker and will try to repeat anything i ask him to.

Tantrums:

Sadly it’s not all fun and games in our house, the tantrums are still occurring. They do tend to change shape though. We’re seeing less head banging (which is nice for me) but we still have a lot of drop and roll. He is having tantrums at the drop of a hat. Mainly if you tell him now or try to take him away from something he was doing (like trying to get him to have his nappy changed when he’s playing). I try really hard not to be a mean shouty mum but sometimes its hard not to be. I try and catch his attention and lure him away from his toys. More often than not this doesn’t work and I resort to pick him up which is when all hell breaks loose. The tantrums are here to stay for a few years yet there just a part of kids growing up. Hormonal me feels a bit sad lately like the tantrums are my fault but sensible me knows in the back of my head that really they are not.

Overall Max is a good kid who has his moments.

In six weeks his life is going to change all over again and it makes me nervous that I can’t predict how he is going to adapt to that. We’re just going to have to roll with the punches on that one.

 

 

 

 

 

 

You may have noticed

That the past few days have been a bit up and down for me and Max. Especially it seems in the afternoon. I know why he’s being a sod it’s because he’s tired. I need to find a balance between Max getting the sleep he needs during the day and sleeping well at night. Let’s not kid ourselves were not at out best if we are sleep deprived.

Max is a good kid il point out, 90%of the time he is actually a well behaved toddler. He also only tends to be on the naughty side with me which I prefer.  His social skills are excellant and he is so affectionate.

I don’t however want my blog to be just about the good side to parenting because in real life parenting is about the ups and downs.

I’m with my boy 24/7 7 days a week (with the odd day off when he spends the day with nanny and granddad). I’m not a drop off parent. He is my son, my responsibility nobody else’s (apart from  his fathers).

Am I a good parent is something I ask myself regularly. I think the answer is time will tell. I just have to make sure I help Max in as many ways as I can.To not ever hold back his development bit to encourage and praise where needed. He leads a happy life with a mother and father who love him.

Of course were going to have days like yesterday afternoon after all were only human.